apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
