at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
