I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
