just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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