we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Randomize
