does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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