Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I want you more than these girls want KFC
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
