4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
