You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
