he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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