yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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