I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
