Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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