My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
