A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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