Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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