he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
