when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
