Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Randomize
