i would punch a child for taco bell
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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