96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
