I just saw a hot homeless man
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
