Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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