Define "chronic" masturbator.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
