I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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