please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
