there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
