dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
