As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
