My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
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