so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
