Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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