oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
