thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
