i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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