the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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