My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
