you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
