Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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