I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I fill condoms, not promises.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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