Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize