I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
