and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
