No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
