do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
