Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
