honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
