Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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