Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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