no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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