that's an acceptable place to lick
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Randomize
